Some children can easily process the impact of bullying behaviour, while others struggle with the aftereffects of these traumatic events for years.
Tebello Mabusela, a counselling psychologist and psychology lecturer at the North-West University (NWU), discusses some of the consequences and the real price of bullying for some victims.
She says a delay in processing traumatic feelings caused by bullying will have an impact on the type of adult one becomes. Adults who were bullied as children tend to display unhealthy coping, anger, aggression and self-soothing tendencies such as substance abuse and self-harm to numb the pain.
“These unhealthy coping strategies can lead to self-destruction in many areas of life. Sometimes, new challenges mean learning new ways of coping, but some adults with delayed processing of past trauma are rigid in their own ways of coping and find it hard to adapt positively to new circumstances,” says Tebello.
She adds that victims of bullying can also experience mental health illnesses such as post-traumatic stress and trauma-related disorders, which can lead to anxiety, depression and dissociation, and can later on manifest as personality disorders that are not easy to treat.
Victims can also experience psychosomatic symptoms, the physical reaction to constant psychological distress that manifests as persistent headaches, neck and back pain, and sometimes digestive and hormonal problems.
Help for victims
Our character traits, upbringing, role models, environmental perceptions and experiences are what influence us to deal with life’s challenges differently.
Tebello says that parents and guardians must note that bullies and victims are shaped by the environment, and both have traumatic experiences to process. Victims have to process trauma immediately to prevent long-term unhealthy coping mechanisms and maladaptive functioning, while bullies have to process trauma that has been long-standing and manifests as aggression, anger, unhealthy coping strategies and maladaptive functioning.
She advises parents and guardians whose children have experienced bullying to contact various healthcare professionals who can quickly address the trauma. These healthcare professionals can help with processing feelings and help victims with healing and learning healthier ways of coping, gaining insight, reconstructing a new narrative and achieving positive mental health.
Although acts of bullying affect people differently, parents and guardians should seek assistance for children from healthcare professionals to avoid long-term harm.
