October is Mental Health Awareness Month, and Dr Kobus du Plooy, clinical psychologist at the North-West University’s (NWU's) Institute of Psychology and Wellbeing, shares the following article in support of this important campaign.

Few changes over the last several decades have impacted modern society as much as the rapid advances in technology. As with previous ages throughout history, the so-called information age of technology that we are currently in has brought many changes to our lives, some more advantageous than others.

The way individuals communicate is one change that is having an ever-increasing impact on the nature and quality of people’s communication and interpersonal relationships. This is important considering that the effectiveness of our communication in relationships plays a crucial role in improving and maintaining our mental health, whether we are interacting in boardrooms, sports teams, at home or in any other settings.

How does this relate to Mental Illness Awareness Month?

You will commonly find during Mental Illness Awareness Month that most discussions and articles by experts tend to focus almost exclusively on specific, diagnosable types of mental illnesses, informing the public of their symptoms and treatment. Unfortunately, these articles and discussions frequently exclude the important and often underestimated connection between the nature and quality of people’s interpersonal relationships and their degree of mental health.

How does the quality of people’s relationships relate to mental health?

Try for a moment to consider that no one has direct “access” to another person’s thoughts or feelings apart from what they convey between them via communication (through both verbal and non-verbal channels). It is therefore impossible for anyone to “mind read” or “look inside” you to see what you are thinking or feeling at any given point in time. Furthermore, the “things” that make us feel happy and which promote our mental health are precisely those which we can only obtain from our communication in relationships with others. Just think about validation, support and empathy, to name but a few of the essential ingredients we require to feel happy and be mentally healthy. When you look at people you consider to be happy and mentally healthy individuals, you will most likely find on closer inspection that they all communicate effectively and, as a result, have established a set of close and supportive relationships in their lives.

These relationships often assist them to remain mentally healthy by acting as a “buffer” to the impact of the inevitable setbacks of life. It is not that these people are free from adversity, as some tend to believe. Instead, they all tend to have cultivated a strong social system which they can, and often do, use during times of hardship. In the process, they obtain tangible support and inputs to assist them.

Sadly, this aspect is becoming more and more neglected as people tend to live more isolated lives in the information age, communicating via technology while pleading a lack of time to personally connect with others. Most modern-day people tend to believe that to “like” someone’s picture or post on social media is effective communication and fosters close relationships, which unfortunately is a fallacy. More and more, people who are diagnosed with mental illnesses are socially isolated in the sense that they maintain large interpersonal distance in their relationships through superficial technological contact with others.

Given this current state of affairs, should we seek to completely exclude technology from our lives?

Definitely not! I am sure none of us would like to stand in long queues at the bank again instead of simply using online banking. This is but one example of a huge benefit that technology has brought to our lives. The answer lies not in excluding technology but rather in striving towards an optimal blend between quality communications in our relationships and using technology to benefit our lives. How can this be achieved? As a first step, by spending more quality time with the important people in our lives.

Where to start?

I suggest challenging yourself during this Mental Illness Awareness Month to make a renewed effort to contact the people you care about and to schedule quality, technology-free time to meet and interact with them. Remember that although you may be thinking about them, they will be unaware of this until you have actually contacted them. As human beings we were never designed to be socially isolated. In fact, isolation and loneliness have been found to contribute to a host of physical and mental health-related difficulties. It can be said that we, like many other species on this planet, are “pack animals” and need each other to be mentally healthy and live happy lives.

The information age of technology has come laden with communication minefields that make it harder and harder for us to create and maintain meaningful relationships; however, this can be avoided if we choose to do so. So why not pick up that smartphone right now and, instead of using it as your sole means of communication, use it to arrange a face-to-face meeting with someone you care about?

You might be surprised that they would prefer to engage with you in person, instead of only receiving a text message or your next “like” on a social media platform…